Dear Mr. Abby [Archive] - ForumsHQ

[Xetox]

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.

A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing

that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next

best thing - your best friend. Far from being an issue, this

can bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old

college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive,

maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If

you're still not sure then just perform oral on him and cook

him a nice meal while you think about it.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.

A: Do it. Sperm can help you loose weight and gives a great glow

to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you

to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves

you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a

day. Then cook him a nice meal.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged.

The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess

with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great

stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home.

Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the

man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the

house too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he

returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home

is for you and your best friend to perform oral on him. Then cook

him a nice meal.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess

with it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help.

You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it

to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt,

perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek

sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time

consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with

no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not

love your man as much as you should - he should never have to work

to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make

it up to him by performing oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep

never giving me one.

A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten

to cook him a nice meal.

[iNViSiGOD]

Man Xetox, you have issues, where do you get this shit from?

[Raybdbomb]

that was funny as hell

[xzero]

heh...

[Xetox]

Quote (iNViSiGOD @ Jan. 09 2002,10:48)Man Xetox, you have issues, where do you get this shit from? *[/quote]

I am just the KING OF CLUB MMB

[Blue Cap Jones]

That was funny