Einstein Dies and goes to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter says, "You look like Einstein, but you have NO idea what some people will do to sneak into Heaven. Can you prove who you really are?"
Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, "Could I have a blackboard and some chalk?"
Saint Peter snaps his fingers, and a blackboard and chalk instantly appear. Einstein proceeds to describe with arcane mathematics and symbols his theory of relativity.
Saint Peter is suitably impressed. "You really ARE Einstein!" he says. "Welcome to heaven!"
The next to arrive is Picasso. Once again, Saint Peter asks for credentials. Picasso asks, "Mind if I use that blackboard and chalk?" Saint Peter says, "Go ahead." Picasso erases Einstein's equations and sketches a stunning mural with just a few strokes of chalk.
Saint Peter claps. "Surely you are the great artist you claim to be!" he says. "Come on in!"
Then Saint Peter looks up and sees George W. Bush. Saint Peter scratches his head and says, "Einstein and Picasso both managed to prove their identity. How can you prove yours?"
George W. looks bewildered and says, "Who are Einstein and Picasso?"
Saint Peter sighs and says, "Come on in, George."
George W
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Rust In Peace
Re: George W
Haha, that's pretty good, but isn't he doomed to go to hell for his crimes against humanity?
Re: George W
And on the flip side of this coin...............................................
Saddam Hussein and his chauffeur were cruisin down the I-69 highway when suddenly they hit a pig crossing the road.
It was killed instantly, so Saddam informs the driver to: "Go to the farm over the bypass and explain to the pig's owner what happened."
An hour later, Saddam sees his driver coming back from the farm, his clothes all wrinkled, a bottle of wine in one hand and a cigar in the other.
"What happened to you?" asks Saddam.
"Well, the farmer gave me this bottle of wine, his wife, the cigar and their 21 year old daughter made passionate love to me."
"My God! What did you tell them?" asked the President.
The driver answered: "Good afternoon, I am Saddam Hussein's chauffeur and I have just killed the pig."
Saddam Hussein and his chauffeur were cruisin down the I-69 highway when suddenly they hit a pig crossing the road.
It was killed instantly, so Saddam informs the driver to: "Go to the farm over the bypass and explain to the pig's owner what happened."
An hour later, Saddam sees his driver coming back from the farm, his clothes all wrinkled, a bottle of wine in one hand and a cigar in the other.
"What happened to you?" asks Saddam.
"Well, the farmer gave me this bottle of wine, his wife, the cigar and their 21 year old daughter made passionate love to me."
"My God! What did you tell them?" asked the President.
The driver answered: "Good afternoon, I am Saddam Hussein's chauffeur and I have just killed the pig."