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My life is just a life no more no less

I dont care about how I look or dress

I try to help everyone I can

but it never seems to go according to plan

I cant help the ones I love the most even my babies mamma

because I get caught up in all the drama



I feel like no other and its cold inside

so cold I use the frostbite as my guide

nobody knows what I am holding in

but I have committed the fatal sin

I just wish life was easier maybe even for a new start

you have no idea how bad this rips me apart



Two lives is how I live to hide all the pain

one is slowly dying off, and one as a front so I seem sane

some people tell me its ok its not my fault

my heart wont let them in because it is a tight vault

Its hard to believe them and think everything is ok

but I dont want to re-open the pain that numbs my life today



The memory comes and goes leaving nothing in between

Forget about dreaming it never happens I wish I could remember that scene

I wish I could change some things within my light

I am no different then anyone else without the will to fight

except I have one painful problem that is ruining me

I never wanted to hurt anyone cant they see



I try to be as honest to everyone as I can

I even help the old man Dan

but the biggest lie I have ever told was to myself and that hurts a like a bite to the ear

I cant deny the pain any longer I need to get away from this fear

I used to be gentle and kind

now I am in a place no one can find



You can read this and just shrug it away

I am sorry for wasting your time and I will just go through another day

but if you knew the real me

you would wish for the old serenity

I used to have a happy union with body and mind but that is gone

now it is a battle to the death with myself and the memory that keeps me up till dawn



Brunt

I guess you could move this into the poetry section..I didn't know we had one lol