Dear Mr. Abby [Archive] - ForumsHQ
Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2002 9:24 am
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.
A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing
that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next
best thing - your best friend. Far from being an issue, this
can bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old
college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive,
maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If
you're still not sure then just perform oral on him and cook
him a nice meal while you think about it.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.
A: Do it. Sperm can help you loose weight and gives a great glow
to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you
to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves
you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a
day. Then cook him a nice meal.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.
A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged.
The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess
with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great
stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home.
Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the
man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the
house too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he
returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home
is for you and your best friend to perform oral on him. Then cook
him a nice meal.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.
A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess
with it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help.
You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it
to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt,
perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.
A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek
sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time
consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with
no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not
love your man as much as you should - he should never have to work
to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make
it up to him by performing oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep
never giving me one.
A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten
to cook him a nice meal.
Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.
A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing
that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next
best thing - your best friend. Far from being an issue, this
can bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old
college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive,
maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If
you're still not sure then just perform oral on him and cook
him a nice meal while you think about it.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.
A: Do it. Sperm can help you loose weight and gives a great glow
to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you
to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves
you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a
day. Then cook him a nice meal.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.
A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged.
The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess
with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great
stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home.
Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the
man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the
house too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he
returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home
is for you and your best friend to perform oral on him. Then cook
him a nice meal.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.
A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess
with it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help.
You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it
to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt,
perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.
A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek
sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time
consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with
no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not
love your man as much as you should - he should never have to work
to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make
it up to him by performing oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal.
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep
never giving me one.
A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten
to cook him a nice meal.